12 comments


  • Fran

    I just figured the delay in getting a response to requests for advice was part of a therapeutic plan. 😉

    May 16, 2014
    • ah yes – my master plan. Of course that was it.

      May 17, 2014
  • S. K.

    Ooh, does that mean there’s room for more submissions? Your newest story has me inspired to try some nonfiction!

    May 16, 2014
  • Serena

    What kind of writing are you looking for? Do you have a certain limit on length?

    May 16, 2014
    • Fiction, creative non-fiction, poetry, musings, essays – pretty much anything, as the New York Times says, that’s fit to print. I try to keep my posts under 1000 words.

      May 17, 2014
  • In Defense of Feeling

    Well, I wasn’t going to say anything, but since you asked, I asked about something I really wanted to hear back about and never did. That was back in March. It was long, and I talked about some pretty ugly stuff so I just figured you opted not to address it. Maybe you tried to send an answer to my email, but I was too scared to give a real email so I heard nothing. I so deeply respect and appreciate what you’ve offered to others, I hoped to hear what you might offer me. Thank you for what you do. The compassion comes through no matter who its addressed to.

    May 18, 2014
    • Hi, GKHamilton@yahoo.com – I’m bummed out that you didn’t get my reply. I remember your letter well, both the pain of it and the triumph of it. I wrote back to you and asked if you would consider allowing me to shorten it and would it be okay not to post it to Facebook so that anyone who would be triggered by it would not accidentally trip across it. It’s odd that I heard back from you today as The New York Times had an article on the front page of yesterday’s paper about holding professors responsible for giving warning to students that the content of a particular book or article or story could possibly be triggering to people with trauma histories. The debate is ongoing and contentious and I am not even sure what I think about it but I can’t help noticing that it is being talked about. So, thank you for following up with me and how do you feel/what do you think about this idea?

      May 19, 2014
  • In Defense of Feeling

    Thank you so much for your response. I’m absolutely okay with whatever modification you need to make in order to address it. I do understand about the triggers. I’ve spent a lot of years hiding from the subject I wrote about, so truly, I get it. A response to my question would mean a lot to me. Again, thank you Dulcie.

    May 19, 2014
    • I reread your letter. You describe a warriors journey from being someone who could have been lost to being someone who is owning your own body. At the end you say:

      “I know this is long, and I’m not sure if I’m making sense. This is all really hard to talk about, but at the same time, I’m ready to let go of old stories that no longer serve me. I’m not sure how to do that.”

      You have clearly done a lot of work already and it appears to me that you are acutely aware of what is needed in your mind and heart and body in order to go/grow forward. So if your question is how to keep going I would say to cultivate ways that bring your body /mind pleasure that do not involve sex, not because sex is not a perfectly fine and lovely thing but more so that your body remembers what unhindered pleasure feels like. Swimming, massage (self or otherwise depending on which feels more comfortable), facials, laughing – stuff that just plain feels good and does not evoke conflicted memories or sensations. Kind of like systematic desensitization except it is systematic sensitization instead. What do you think?

      May 21, 2014
  • In Defense of Feeling

    I’m noticing that the more open my heart is, the harder kind words of acknowledgment hit. Just letting the sadness and the pleasure of being truly heard both be here. Your suggestion makes sense to me. If what I’m doing feels good, pay attention to it, do it more, consciously strengthen the connection between body/brain in situations without triggers. I can do that. Thank you for hearing me.

    May 21, 2014
    • yes, I believe you can.

      May 22, 2014

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